A Personal Reflection

I'm a bit scared that Dave's leaving soon. With only four people who consistently attend the group, dynamics change when one person leaves.

Dave brings a sense of authentic sharing and inquisitiveness to the group. He participates fully and always listens. He is often very affirming. What happens when you lose this kind of person?

Writing helps because I gain perspective through it. I am reminded that this is not my group. If I truly believe that it is the Holy Spirit that sustains it then I must place my trust in Him. I simply need to be faithful and do the things that I am entrusted with.

Newcomer dynamics

Our group is pretty unique when compared to other small groups. We have communion on a weekly basis, value participation, and attempt to create an environment where ideas and discussions emerge organically. There is no appointed leader in the sense that he/she dictates programs or the direction of the group.

When a newcomer experiences this we're not quite sure how they'll react. We had this happen a couple Saturdays back and I felt like it changed the dynamic of the meeting. When you sense that there may be someone there who doesn't fully "get it" or doesn't voice out like everyone else, it changes things. We become conscious of that person and wonder whether or not he's doing alright. We also become more guarded because the relationship hasn't developed.

What do we do then when people decide to check out our group? What I don't want to happen is a full explanation of what our group is about to this new person. It happened to me when I once visited a group. They spent hours explaining their theology, philosophy, and level of hierarchy. The whole time I was screaming inside, "show me what you do!" Let me experience it! We would rather experience a community than be told what it's about.

Being secure in who you are as a group is difficult when you feel that you are constantly being scrutinized. Perhaps this is partly rooted in trying to retain the newcomer. This is rooted in my own insecurity. Accepting the fact that you can't please everyone maybe the first step I need to take. Surrendering to the spirit and acknowledging His work in all of us takes pressure off of me, or us for that matter, to convince that individual to stay.

Dave's Thoughts...

     It’s a privilege to be a part of this community.  In the past weeks we have pondered so many aspects of who Jesus is, what church is, who we are, and how we should live in this world.  Discussion has been at times abstract, and at other times, tangible and personal.  No subject is off limits if it is on someone’s mind.  We bring diversity to our common table, realizing that unity which anchors us all.  Seeing this unified diversity is beautiful as we each have our differences, but encourage each other in the things we are passionate about. 

     This is not to say we have a perfect community.  In our search for perfect community, I think we acknowledge there is none.  We come together because we are broken, tired, and spent.  We come to experience God’s presence, which is partly shown through the way we share each other’s joys and burdens.  In our dialogue, listen to one another’s story or ideas, and in turn we are also listened to.  Through this discussion we question, dream, learn, and grow together in Christ.

A Safe Place

A young group that meets weekly rides on momentum. I have been in groups where a missed meeting breaks the rhythm. I was scared this was going to happen to ours. We had an awesome communion two Saturdays ago but missed last Saturday because of appointments and events. I was a bit anxious about tonight's meeting.

As with all our meetings, we had communion. We shared reflections as we partook of the body and blood of Christ.

Towards the end of our meeting Kokoy mentioned that this was one of the safest place for him. How cool is that! This is why we exist. We want to create a place where people are safe and where they can be authentic and transparent but still be accepted and loved. We yearn to be known fully and deeply.

One of my prayers would be for us to have a missional component. I think it's important for the Body of Christ to reach out and bring life to our communities. It'll be a bit tough since most are involved in their own ministry or work. For now having communion on Saturdays and sharing our lives will have to do.

I often wonder if Jesus had community in mind when he prayed, "thy kingdom come." For me, I certainly feel a taste of heaven on Saturday nights at 8.